Quentin Tarantino Refuses To Get Rid of Run Down Volvo

Quentin Tarantino has six luxury cars at his Los Angeles home, but it's his old Volvo - which he bought identical models of for himself and first love Grace - that is his most prized possession. Grace worked with Tarantino in a video store and dated on and off for seven years before splitting for good after filming 1994 hit, Pulp Fiction.

Quentin says, "Years have passed, she's married and has kids and everything, but she still was the love of my life - of the first half of my life.

"I'm sure she doesn't even have that car anymore, but it's my
last little connection to her."

Jessica Biel to play Wonder Woman?

A host of names have been linked to play Wonder Woman and here's one that actually makes sense... Jessica Biel. Word is she is in talks to play comic book superhero in upcoming movie 'Justice League Of America.'

The film will follow the adventures of an elite group of super-heroes, including Batman, Wonder Woman, Superman, Aquaman and the Flash.

Mad Max director George Miller will direct.

Farrah Fawcett Suffers Cancer Relapse

Former "Charlie's Angels" star Farrah Fawcett has suffered a
relapse in her battle against cancer and plans to pursue
alternative treatments in Germany, this according to reports.

"She is in Germany for therapy. She is getting informed about
several treatment methods that would be possible for her," Kathrin
Collins, a spokeswoman for Farrah told Germany's weekly Bunte
which hits newsstands Thursday.

Bunte said that Farrah would undergo chemotherapy at Frankfurt
University Hospital as well as alternative treatments in a clinic
in Bad Wiessee in the southern state of Bavaria.

She had been declared cancer-free by her doctors in February after
having a tumor removed in October... but cancerous cells reappeared
in her colon in this past May.

Best Prank Ever

High school students pulled off this prank by using an underground tunnel under a crosswalk

There are no ugly women

This photo was taken at a competition in June 2006. The competition was between 9 women for best makeover. They had every possible beauty treatment available to them over a period of 12 hours before the contest. Look at the before and after photos.

Conclusion - There are no ugly women, only those who can't afford a makeover.

(The woman 2nd from the left won the contest.)

'24' star arrested on drunken driving charges

Kiefer Sutherland was arrested early Tuesday on misdemeanor drunken driving charges after failing a field sobriety test, police officials said.

The actor was pulled over at about 1:10 a.m. in West Los Angeles after officers spotted him making an illegal U-turn, said Officer Kevin Maiberger.

Sutherland, 40, tested over the state's legal blood alcohol limit of .08 percent, and was arrested on a misdemeanor charge of driving under the influence, Officer Karen Smith said.

He was released around 4 a.m. after posting $25,000 bail, according to Sheriff's Department records.

Maiberger said Sutherland was scheduled to appear in court October 16.

Sutherland won a best actor Emmy award last year for his performance on the Fox TV series "24." The series is set to return to the air in

Congratulations to Salma Hayek

Congratulations to Salma Hayek as she and her businessman fiancé François Henri Pinault welcomed daughter Valentina Paloma Pinault into the world on Friday.

"Mother and child are doing well," said publicist Carl Ross in a statement. No further details are released.

It is the first child for the 41-year-old Salma Hayek.

"The View" co-host doesn't know if earth is round or flat

I can’t believe this. One of the co-hosts of The View, Sherri Sheppherd, said she didn’t believe in evolution so co-host Whoopi Goldberg asked her if she believed the world was flat or round. She wasn’t able to answer, using the excuse that she was too busy being a good little housewife to think about complicated things like matters that science settled hundreds of years ago. Amazing.

Partial transcript:

WHOOPI GOLDBERG: Is the world flat?

SHERRI SHEPHERD: Is the world flat? (laughter)

GOLDBERG: Yes.

SHEPHERD: …I Don’t know.

GOLDBERG: What do you think?

SHEPHERD: I… I never thought about it, Whoopi. Is the world flat? I never thought about it.

BARBARA WALTERS: You’ve never thought about whether the world was round or flat?

SHEPHERD: I tell you what I’ve thought about. How I’m going to feed my child–

WALTERS: Well you can do both.

SHEPERD: …how I’m going to take care of my family. The world, is the world flat has never entered into, like that has not been an important thing to me.

ELIZABETH HASSELBECK: You’ll teach your son, Jeffery, right?

SHEPHERD: If my son, Jeffery, asks me ‘is the world flat,’ I guess I would go…

JOY BEHAR: You know, didn’t some person already work this question out? I mean, why are we doing this again? (laughter, applause)

Aussie mom sues doctor because she had twins

CANBERRA, Australia (AP) - An Australian woman who gave birth to twins instead of a single baby after undergoing in-vitro fertilization has sued her doctor for the cost of bringing up the second child.

The woman, who cannot be identified because of a court order, is seeking $329,000 to cover the expense of raising one child until age 21.

Testifying in the Supreme Court of the Australian Capital Territory on Tuesday, the 40-year-old mother said she told her doctor that she only wanted one child.

But an embryologist under the doctor's supervision implanted two embryos in her uterus, resulting in the birth of non-identical twin girls.

The woman told the court that she and her female partner were devastated when they learned she was carrying twins, and even considered putting one of the babies up for adoption.

The couple, whose combined income exceeds $82,875, are seeking $329,000 to cover the costs of raising one of the girls, including private school fees. They also want more than $12,000 to compensate them for time off work and medical expenses.

Last month: Selling brocolli as pot. This month: Selling vinegar mixed with catfish bait as heroin

Trio jailed for fish-bait 'heroin'

LEBANON, Ohio - Three people who mixed vinegar with catfish bait and tried to sell it as heroin got hooked by undercover officers. Authorities said the three also tried to sell fake LSD.

John Burke, director of the Greater Warren County Drug Task Force, said he didn't know what might happen if someone actually injected a bait-vinegar concoction. Authorities don't know whether anyone else bought the counterfeit drug.

"We have gotten no reports of anyone else getting them, but quite frankly the people who may have gotten them aren't likely to report it," prosecutor Rachel Hutzel said Wednesday.

William Perry, 22, of Columbus, and Rosanne Wead, 20, of Piqua, each pleaded guilty Tuesday in Warren County Common Pleas Court to a count of trafficking in counterfeit controlled substances. A third person, Jerry Snowden, 27, of Piqua, pleaded guilty last month to a counterfeit substance charge. He was sentenced to 18 months in prison.

Wead was sentenced to six months in prison; Perry has not been sentenced.

Lebanon is about 25 miles north of Cincinnati.

Buggy Rollin'

Have you ever heard of Buggy Rollin? If not, then you are about to be amazed when you see this video. Frenchman Jean-Yves Blondeau first conceived of his plastic Buggy Rollin' suit in 1994, while he was a student at Olivier de Serres design school, in Paris. But the invention, which allows a wearer to top 60 miles per hour while maintaining any position found in the Kama Sutra, didn't exactly catch fire with consumers. Not one to give up, Blondeau recently refined the suit to a stripped-down 31-wheel version and developed his own playbook of moves, like the Zaphial (rolling flat on your back with all four limbs pointed straight up) and the Smooth Buggy Dog (three limbs on the ground and one rolling along a wall).

Madonna has man-hands and Guy Ritchie is in for one hell of a night!

Madonna bought herself a brand-spankin’ new penis over the weekend. And it’s purple!


Madonna was spotted leaving London’s Claridge’s Hotel toting a see-through plastic bag which revealed her latest purchase - a strap-on sex toy. Apparently it’s a Purple Penetrator, so perhaps Madonna really does wear the trousers in her relationship. Husband Guy Ritchie, who trailed behind looking rather sheepish, had a carry case of his own, but had the good grace to keep its contents under wraps.

Salty burger lands McDonald's employee in jail

They take their fast food hamburgers seriously down in
Georgia. Seriously enough that if you screw with a man's
Big Mac you're doing jail time.

It all started in Union City, Georgia where a 20-year-old
MacDonald's employee named Kendra Bull accidentally over-
salted some hamburger patties. She told her supervisor who
tried to thump the salt off and figured they were good to
go.

This is similar to the five second rule. If you drop your
food on the ground but pick it up within five seconds it is
still okay to eat. Similarly, if you dump several ounces of
salt on a hamburger patty in Georgia but immediately try to
scrape it off, it's still okay to eat.

Unfortunately for Ms. Bull, the next person to order a ham-
burger was Police Officer Wendell Adams. Apparently Officer
Adams had not heard of the scraping-the-salt-off rule because
he became sick from eating the over-salted burger and decided
it was done deliberately.

Kendra Bull was arrested, charged with misdemeanor reckless
conduct, and spent the night in jail.

Bull defended herself by saying that she had eaten one of
the salty burgers on her break and didn't get sick. But that
didn't cut any ice with the law.

And just to make sure the tax-payers' money is being well-
spent the police sent samples of the burger to the state
crime lab for tests. There is no word yet on if it is actually
meat or just sawdust and beef-tallow.

Minnesota Toe Licker Nabbed

Meet Carlton Davis. The Minnesota man, 26, is facing felony charges for allegedly stealing a cell phone and purse from a woman he mugged on a St. Paul street early Saturday morning. According to police, after the woman turned over her belongings, Davis announced, "Now I'm going to suck your feet." Which he did, after the 24-year-old victim removed her shoes. Davis, who fled when passersby approached, was apprehended by cops a few blocks from the crime scene. He was booked into the Ramsey County lockup, where the below mug shot was snapped.

Kathy Griffin's Jesus remark cut from Emmy show

Comic Kathy Griffin's "offensive" remarks about Jesus at the Creative Arts Emmy Awards will be cut from a pre-taped telecast of the show, the Academy of Television Arts and Sciences said on Tuesday.

Griffin made the provocative comment on Saturday night as she took the stage of the Shrine Auditorium to collect her Emmy for best reality program for her Bravo channel show "My Life on the D-List."

"A lot of people come up here and thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus," an exultant Griffin said, holding up her statuette. "Suck it, Jesus. This award is my god now."

Asked about her speech backstage a short time later, an unrepentant Griffin added, "I hope I offended some people. I didn't want to win the Emmy for nothing."

The speech drew fire from a leading Roman Catholic group, the Catholic League for Religious and Civil Rights, which condemned Griffin's remarks as "obscene and blasphemous."

"It is a sure bet that if Griffin had said, 'Suck it, Muhammad,' there would have been a very different reaction," Catholic league president Bill Donohue said in a statement posted on the group's Web site. He called on TV academy president Dick Askin to denounce Griffin's "hate speech" and on Griffin to apologize.

An edited version of the Creative Arts Emmys is set to air on cable television's E! Entertainment Network on Saturday, the night before the live Fox network broadcast of the main Primetime Emmy Awards.

"Kathy Griffin's offensive remarks will not be part of the E! telecast," an academy spokeswoman said on Tuesday. An "abbreviated version" of her acceptance speech will air, instead, she said.

Griffin's reaction to the imbroglio, according to a statement issued by her publicist: "Am I the only Catholic left with a sense of humor?"

Ethiopia rings in new Millennium

Celebrations have been taking place in the streets of Addis Ababa as Ethiopia ushers in the new Millennium.
The country uses the calendar of the Coptic Orthodox Church - which means the year 2000 began at midnight on Wednesday (2100GMT on Tuesday).

Fireworks lit up the sky above the city, as revellers gathered in the streets for a cultural festival.

A more exclusive event was attended by a number of African leaders, including Kenya's Mwai Kibaki.

In the 6th Century, the rest of Christendom revised its estimate of the date of the birth of Christ - but Ethiopia stuck with the old date, which means it was stuck more than seven years behind the rest of the world.

Ethiopians gathered together in churches all over the country to mark the occasion.

'Time for renaissance'

Speaking at the main event to welcome in the Millennium, Prime Minister Meles Zenawi spoke of the glories of Ethiopia's first 1,000 years.

He said decline then occurred, but now it was time for an Ethiopian renaissance.

"A thousand years from now, when Ethiopians gather to welcome the fourth Millennium, they shall say the eve of the third Millennium was the beginning of the end of the dark ages in Ethiopia," he said.

Because it was never colonised, Ethiopia has always had a special significance for the rest of Africa - which was summed up by the chairman of the African Union, Alpha Oumar Konare.

"We thank Ethiopia for keeping up the flame of African unity," he said.

He was speaking at the new exhibition hall where foreign dignitaries gathered.

But correspondents say Ethiopians have mixed feelings about the Millennium celebrations.

Some residents of Addis Ababa - an opposition stronghold - criticised the government's campaign to clear the streets of beggars and the rising cost of food ahead of the celebrations.

Tickets for a concert featuring US hip hop group the Black Eyed Peas cost $170, two months' salary for an average Ethiopian.

Terrorists: We'll cut off head of 'prostitute' Britney Spears

Muslim terrorist leaders threatened to forcibly convert Britney Spears and Madonna to Islam and warned if they resist, their heads would be cut off for "spreading Satanic culture," according to a new book released today.

The threats, recorded on audio, come as Madonna is due to arrive in Israel Wednesday to celebrate the Jewish new year with fellow Kabbalah practitioners.

"If I meet these whores I will have the honor – I repeat, I will have the honor – to be the first one to cut the heads off Madonna and Britney Spears if they will keep spreading their satanic culture against Islam," said Muhammad Abdel-Al, spokesman and senior leader of the Popular Resistance Committees terror organization.

The Committees, largely based in the Gaza Strip, has carried out thousands of rocket attacks against Jewish population centers and scores of shootings and bombings. It is suspected of bombing a U.S. convoy in Gaza in 2003 and took credit for a rocket attack yesterday that hit an Israeli military base wounding 69 – the largest casualty number of any Palestinian rocket attack.

Abu Abdullah, a senior member of Hamas' so-called "military wing" is quoted in "Schmoozing" describing what his group would do with Madonna and Spears if jihad groups took over the U.S.:

"At the beginning, we will try to convince Madonna and Britney Spears to follow Allah's way. But I honestly don't think they will follow. If they persist with their whoring music, we will prevent them by force. I don't think that I can be in the same place with these singers. They might be killed if they do not respect our laws."

The Committees' Abdel-Al accused Madonna and Spears of "spreading this culture by the Americans as part of the war against Islam."

"If these two prostitutes [Madonna and Spears] keep doing what they are doing, we of course will punish them. First we will call them to join Islam. But if they keep what they are doing ... we can stone them or even we can kill them if they keep ... tempting men in order to put them far from Islam. ... A prostitute woman must be stoned or must be eighty times hit with a belt."

Abdel-El said even before Islam takes over America he would personally kill Madonna and Spears if he ran into them. He boasted he would "be the first one to cut the heads of Madonna and Britney Spears."

50 Cent: 'I kicked Kanye off the show'

Kanye West's much-publicised boycott of MTV worked well for rap rival 50 Cent on Tuesday - he took credit for the 'Gold Digger' star's 'Total Request Live' no show.

Both rappers were expected to appear on the U.S. show to promote their albums, which were released on the same day - but West pulled out of the programme after falling out with MTV bosses over the way he was treated at the Video Music Awards on Sunday night.

West was nominated for five prizes but walked away from the event empty handed, and, after publicly hurling abuse at organisers backstage, the temperamental rapper announced he was boycotting the network.

As a result, artwork for his new album Graduation was covered on TRL and 50 Cent hit the New York studios alone, boasting: "I threw him off the show."

50 added: "He's nervous. You think he had problems with MTV? Nah, he knew he had to be here today."

Kanye West Blames MTV For Britney Spear's Terrible Performance

Kanye West blames MTV for Britney Spears' less than stellar performance at the Video Music Awards. "Man, they were just trying to get ratings, and they knew she wasn't ready and they exploited her," the 29-year-old rapper said Tuesday on Sirius Satellite Radio's "The Morning Mash Up."

The network made a "bad move" by having the troubled pop star open Sunday's event in Las Vegas, said West, who feels he should have kicked off the show with "Stronger," the first single from his new album, "Graduation."

"They exploited her, they played me and I really don't mess with MTV," he said.

Spears, 25, looked unprepared while performing her new song, "Gimme More," to a bewildered audience of her music industry peers. She seemed nervous and, at times, stopped singing altogether.

In a praise-filled statement released Tuesday afternoon, MTV said it "... has a long and collaborative relationship with Kanye and we hope and look forward to continuing that meaningful relationship."

West said he wanted to perform "Stronger" on the show's main stage — where R&B hotshot Chris Brown wowed the crowd with Michael Jackson-esque dance moves — but complied when he was asked to host a suite party.

West said it was a blow to the ego when Justin Timberlake, who also hosted a suite party, ended up "on the big stage" to give the closing performance with Timbaland and Nelly Furtado.

"Those are the big things, and you know what I do man, I really made the song `Stronger,' you know, for stadiums," he said.

West — who threw a tantrum backstage after losing all five categories for which he was nominated — said he has bonded with 50 Cent over what they view as disrespectful behavior from MTV.

"So why do you have me do `Stronger' in a suite, but you end the show with Justin?" he said. "I looked at 50 like, yo, we need to help each other as much as possible."

50 Cent has said he'd stop making solo records if West's new album outsells his "Curtis" CD in their first week out. Both albums were released Tuesday.

Best News of the Day: Bills' Kevin Everett May Walk Again; Voluntarily Moves Limbs

After suffering what was called a "catastrophic" and life-threatening cervical spin injury, the future looked grim for Bills tight end Kevin Everett. Following emergency surgery in which his third and fourth vertebrae were removed, doctors believed paralysis was was a very real possibility, but did leave a small window of opportunity for a full recovery.

However, miracles are possible, and Everett took his first step toward what seemed almost impossible just yesterday. According to a report by WIVB-TV in Buffalo, the former Miami Hurricane has shown voluntary movement in both his arms and legs.

Due to the surprisingly fast progress, Dr. Andrew Cappuccino has changed his stance a bit, and believes there is much more reason to be optimistic at this point. While a full recovery is still not guaranteed, the future appears to be much brighter for Everett.

Again, I think I stand for everyone when I tip my cap to this kid and wish him well as he continues to come back from the unthinkable.

Google Earth’s Hidden Surprise: A Flight Simulator

We’ve always known that Google has wanted to challenge Microsoft’s desktop dominance in a number of areas, but to date we didn’t know that extended to gaming.

Hidden inside Google Earth is a secret Flight Simulator that takes full advantage of Google’s extensive satellite imagery.

To access the hidden feature, open Google Earth and hit Command+Option+A (note it must be capital A) or Ctrl+Alt+A if you’re using a Windows Machine.

The Google Earth Flight Simulator comes with two aircraft options, a F16 Viper and the more manageable SR22 4 seater. Players have the option of commencing the game from their current location in Google Earth or can pick from a list of pre-determined runways. Control instructions can be found here.

Overall the game play is fairly simple in terms of control, but the striking difference is flying over real pictures of locations. I took a quick flight from San Francisco International, headed North to the Golden Gate then turn back over the city before heading towards the Valley. It wasn’t perfect, but it was as good visually as the paid Microsoft Flight Simulator, and in terms of actually presenting real objects it was better.

Britney Spears Puts on a Craptastic Performance (Video And Pictures)

Britney Spears performing her new single 'Gimme More' at the 2007 MTV MTV Video Music Awards. Dressed in sequined black underpants and bra, an out-of-shape Spears moved tentatively around the stage, getting totally outgrooved by her backup dancers and badly lip-syncing her way through the song whose main lyric was "Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme." Her gyrations were hardly demure, though oddly halfhearted.

Thanks to her annus horribilis — or, more accurately, anni horribiles — she was one of the most anticipated V.M.A. performers in years. Voyeurs around the world were ready to see a fallen star back onstage. She didn’t disappoint: she was awful. Visibly nervous, she tottered around the stage, dancing tentatively and doing nothing that sounded or looked like real live singing.

Designed to drum up excitement for her upcoming album, Spears' kickoff to the Video Music Awards on Sunday night became another example of how far she has fallen.

1909 Wagner baseball card sells for record $2.8M

The finest known example of the famed 1909-11 T206 Honus Wagner was once again sold this week, this time for a record-setting $2.8M in a private transaction conducted by SCP Auctions. The card, graded NM-MT 8 by PSA, was at one time owned by Wayne Gretzky in addition to being the grand prize for a national promotion conducted by Wal-Mart.

Prior to this most recent transaction, SCP Auctions had sold the card this past February for $2.35M to another private party and had themselves taken a minority ownership position in the card.

"The T206 Honus Wagner card is an icon, not only in the field of baseball card collecting, but in the larger field of Americana," said David Kohler, president and CEO of SCP Auctions. "We are privileged to have been involved in the sale of this card, not once but twice."

It's estimated that as few as 70 copies of the T206 Wagner exist to this day. To date, 33 copies have been professionally graded (29 by PSA and four by SGC). Of those, 25 copies are graded between Poor 1 and Good 2, six are VG 3, one is EX 5 and, of course, one very newsworthy copy is NM-MT 8.

17-year old girl makes up to $70,000 a month with MySpace site

Fast Company published a fairly long article in the September edition of their magazine about the 17-year old Ashley Qualls.

This girl runs a MySpace layout and graphics site called Whateverlife. I never heard about this site before but she seems to be doing amazingly well, according to the article the three-year old site receives 7 million unique visitors and 60 million page views a month and this earns her up to $70,000 a month. Most of this revenue seems to come through Google AdSense and ValueClick.

At 17 going on 37 (at least), Ashley is very much an Internet professional. In the less than two years since Whateverlife took off, she has dropped out of high school, bought a house, helped launch artists such as Lily Allen, and rejected offers to buy her young company. Although Ashley was flattered to be offered $1.5 million and a car of her choice–as long as the price tag wasn’t more than $100,000–she responded, in effect, Whatever. “I don’t even have my license yet,” she says.

Ashley is evidence of the meritocracy on the Internet that allows even companies run by neophyte entrepreneurs to compete, regardless of funding, location, size, or experience–and she’s a reminder that ingenuity is ageless. She has taken in more than $1 million, thanks to a now-familiar Web-friendly business model. Her MySpace page layouts are available for the bargain price of…nothing. They’re free for the taking. Her only significant source of revenue so far is advertising.

I already knew that MySpace related sites can bring in a lot of money but this story amazed me, the kind of money she’s pulling in from this site is stunning. Looks like I’m in the wrong niche lol

You can read the full story over here. One of the funny things is that a court ruled in January that neither Ashley nor her parents are allowed to manage her finances:

Until she turns 18, next June, a court-appointed conservator is controlling Whateverlife’s assets; Ashley must request funds for any expense outside the agreed-upon monthly budget.

The arrangement, she says, affects her ability to react in a volatile industry. “It’s not like I’m selling lemonade,” she says. Besides, it’s her company. If she wants to contract developers or employ her mother, Ashley says, why shouldn’t she be able to do it without the conservator’s approval?

So the teenager has hired a lawyer. She wants to emancipate herself and be declared an adult. Now. At 17. Why not just sit tight until June? The girl trying to grow up fast can’t wait that long.

WTF Happened to Kiera Knightley???

Is this the new trend? Who finds anorexic-looking girls attractive? Look at her neck, she looks like E.T.

Kiera once said in an interview that she would prefer to look like Beth Ditto than an anorexic. What happened???

Someone get this girl some Fried Chicken.



This is what Kiera Knightley USED to look like.

Fishermen rape the sea's bounty (literally)

Jitsuwa Makeburu, a stage comedian, used to be a fisherman. A resident of the Izu Islands, he enrolled in a public high school whose curriculum, understandably, offered numerous subjects related to oceanography.

Magazine columnist Kureichi Matsuzawa has long been a fan of Makeburu's humorous fish stories, which, Matsuzawa notes, can't get too raunchy or personal when he's performing in public as they might alienate the audience.

But get him in private and, well, you wind up reeling in something a bit bestial.

We're not talking about legends of making it with mesmerizing mermaids, but something that's the genuine thing. Like manta rays.

"Almost everybody in the fishing business has had sex with a manta at some point," Makeburu asserts.

What!!! A manta??? You mean one of those enormous, intimidating winged things with a stinger on their tail that looks like an aquatic Batman?

Yep. After all, fisherman out on ships spend a loooonggg time at sea without ever encountering a woman, and, well, let's face it, they can get pretty horny. No, dammit, let's make that incredibly horny. Even desperate enough to do it with a manta. Right?

"Nah," shrugs Makeburu. "Coastal fishermen poke them too."

Apparently it's a ritual of manhood, done out of recognition of the dangers of life on the sea.

Before mounting one of these intimidating creatures, points out J.K. special, it is "absolutely essential" that its stinger be removed. Yes, that certainly would make sense.

And of course, there's the matter of protocol. To wit, the ship's captain, if he so chooses, is entitled to go first.

Is your mind suitably boggled? No? Ready for some more?

"A manta's ... thing is kind of similar to a human's," Makeburu says.

Japanese fishermen prove the old adage that there are plenty of fish in the sea. (Mainichi)Okay, well ... not exactly. More than a reproductive organ, it's basically an organ of elimination. So engaging in sex with a manta is basically an act of deep-sea sodomy.

"It's shallow and there's resistance at the other end, so the feeling isn't that good," is how he describes it.

At least the manta survives the violation. "With most fish, we just whack 'em, but we release the manta's we screw back into the ocean," Makeburu relates.

A curious Matsuzawa wonders ... if the captain had an STD, wouldn't the other crew members who had sex with the manta contract it too?

"That's right," grins Makeburu. "So some guys slip on condoms before they do it. Once I came down with the clap. But we were in port around that time and I did it with a woman, so I don't have any way of knowing if I picked it up from her, or from the manta."

Is it common, then, for marine students to lose their virginity to a manta?

"Well, no, actually it's more common for them to lose it to a moray eel," he confides.

What??!! Isn't that, like, dangerous, as in crazy?

"You can stick it in until it bites," he says. "But if you pull it away too fast the skin on your cock will tear."

Apparently once out of the water a moray becomes less aggressive. So you can force its mouth open with your hands, and then stick in your cock and let it chew on your chin-chin.

Of course you can't actually call that sex either; it's only oral sex. Or as an Italian fisherman might croon, "That's a moray!"

An isoginchaku comes in handy for those lonely nights at sea. (Mainichi)Should you happen to find yourself climbing on a seaside crag, you might come across a type of anemone known as "isoginchaku." And this, says Makeburu, bodes well for some fishy frolic.

The creature gets its name from the old Japanese coin purse called a "kinchaku," which puckers tightly in the center when you pull on the drawstrings.

"So if you stick in your you-know-what, it'll snap shut around it," he says. "You don't need any foreplay at all. Just ram the old avenger home. It feels goooood," he grins, rolling his eyes.

Alas, sighs Jitsuwa, Japan's fishing industry is fading fast, and the charming old customs it spawned appear almost certainly doomed. Someday, perhaps soon, all that will remain are these titillating tales, about romances between the men who went to sea and the obliging creatures they encountered therein.

Teacher not hot for Web video

A North Carolina teacher has become the unwilling star of a steamy Internet video shot at a fifth-grade graduation ceremony.

The 3 1/2-minute amateur video features close-ups of teacher Keri McIntyre's face and, ahem, backside set to the Van Halen classic "Hot for Teacher." "Good Morning America Weekend Edition" reported.

"When I saw it I was furious," McIntyre told the news program Sunday.

McIntyre found out about the video when a former student teacher called to say it was posted on YouTube. She then demanded the site pull the clip, but about 200,000 people had already viewed it, the network said.

After YouTube took the clip off its site, the video popped up on the social networking site MySpace.

The teacher is looking for the person responsible for the video, but all of the growing number of private citizens who are accidental Web stars have limited privacy rights when it comes to the Internet.